There is no hiding from God. You can fool the people some of the time. You can fool yourself almost all of the time but you cannot fool God.

The Holy Spirit searches the riches stored in one’s heart. Our true character resides deep within our heart and the only way to really know a person is to know their heart.
The heart. The heart. The heart. Intentions. Intentions. Intentions.

Paul says “I was formerly a blasphemer, a persecutor, rude, arrogant but obtained mercy because I did it ignorantly in unbelief.”

Paul’s words resonate with me. I didn’t know what I didn’t know either.
All of my energies were directed towards my own goals, my own lies, my own indulgence, my own worries, fears, and others expectations of me.
On a Saturday, August 21, 2021 I found grace.

I unclothed myself and fell naked physically, emotionally, and spiritually on the mercy seat.

I surrendered worry, regret, shame, judgement, indulgence, lies, self critique, my own desires, and my depression to the Lord. My heart was searched thoroughly and it was terrifying, but only for what seemed a blink of an eye and then I was caught up in the Spirit for what seemed an eternity. I felt love, release and a change come over me that granted a peace that still passes my understanding.

Like Paul, I experienced and obtained mercy, that in me Christ Jesus could show all long suffering, as a pattern to those who are going to believe on Him for everlasting life.

If God will show mercy to me, God will show mercy to you.
Come home. It’s beautiful here.

I still fall short of the mark daily but I press on with renewed hope and vision for what can be in this life.

I didn’t know what I didn’t know but now that I believe, I know. I know He is the lover of my soul, protector and provider.

I know better now. I will do better, in Him, now. I surrender.

A testimony, Friday, October 22, 2021