I intended my life to be seasoned with salt. I desired to be salty but my religion was all talk.

Judgemental talk, vain talk, and rationalizing talk. I had good works for show. I wasn’t trying to be disingenuous. It’s only looking back that I see that I was disingenuous. I wanted to be a good man and to be thought of as a good man. Walking the walk that most call a Christian walk came easy. The ones I should not have patronized I did, for their approval. Those that were looked down upon, I didn’t have much to do with for fear of judgement. My salt had lost its savor and was good for nothing but to be disrespected and mocked.

Then, I went through the fire.

I became that person that was looked down upon. I looked for compassion from those that I loved the most and found little. I found compassion from those too that were outcast. The fires that I went through altered my “religion” and my view of “religion”.

I thought I would die. I did things publicly I regret. I did things in secret that haunt me. I would search for forgiveness but found none. Love would ultimately lift me. My religion and my dogma didn’t hold up to the fire. It was set ablaze by the Holy Spirit.

Eventually, love promoted me. I eventually did the necessary work to dig deep and determine what it was that I truly believe. Correction; Jesus did the work and dug deep. I simply, after hitting rock bottom, put my faith and trust in Jesus and the victorious work that He alone did.

I believe in the love and grace of Jesus Christ. I still have much unbelief or my actions would always be on point. Still, at times, my actions don’t line up with what I say I believe. Yet, my faith is in His amazing grace. My weakness is actually my Glory and what allows me to have a rich and meaningful relationship with God and with other brothers and sisters who truly seek God.

The fruit of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, meekness, faith and self control.

My tree bears some fruit yet often has worms in it. Only the most elder Christian having been through the fire would be able to look beyond my shortcomings.

Yet, I feel and have faith in the fiery work of the Holy Spirit in my life. My works and words are finally getting in sync. My faith is expanding. A new religion, if one can call it religion is filling the voids….

1) It’s impossible to please God without faith in Him. I’m working on having reckless faith, radical faith in my God.
2) God is not the God of dead works but the God of a lively faith and hope.
3) Love myself.
4) Be loving awareness. Love everything and everyone that I’m aware of and with discernment not judgement.
5) Any other commandment is simplified and taken care of by #4.
6) Connect with the Holy Spirit in my own weak way daily.
7) Shhh! More often.

I hope and pray that the fire is cooling and that He will season me and let me be salty the way He would have me be salty.

I am in love with my savior. I feel God in my life. That’s enough for me.

A testimony or at the least, foolish ramblings from an old man with a child’s heart.
Wednesday, February 23, 2022.

Oh Lord, daily, restore my joy and keep me safe. Remember all those that it’s my honor and duty to pray for today.