Maverick2's Blog

1 Samuel 16:7 ~ But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.

This number on the scale is not me. If you look in my heart as God does, you will see this small child. I tucked him away early in life. He was the best part of me. He was bullied, made fun of and called effiminate. He loved God and often talked to God in His secret place. God had a plan for him but I hid him away. I thought there was something wrong with him so I hid him away where he’d be safe. After all, for so many mean things to be done to him and said about him by those good kids and adults there must be something wrong with him that he needs to change or mask? I thought I was helping him by keeping him locked away. Saving him hurt if you will. Later, and without this kids help I’d turn to food, alcohol, worry, regret, shame, judgement and self willed living determined the world would only know me as I wanted to be known. I wore a mask with all of my interactions because I didn’t want to be bullied or hurt, so I pretended to be something I wasn’t. That is exhausting. It leaves your soul empty and in need of fulfillment. I looked in the wrong places for fulfillment and acceptance unable to accept myself. On August 21, 2021 God reintroduced me to the best part of me and we made up. The child inside of me is sweet, kind, tender hearted and loving. The devil was afraid of this kid so he tried to kill him or at the least suffocate him. The child in me has forgiven me and I’m taking a back seat to him now. I should have always because it’s a lot easier being the real me than being someone I’m not. Now my soul is filled and it’s easier to be disciplined with food and my emotions. God is so good and loves me so. He loves you so too!

Be true to yourself. Don’t let the world stick a finger in your face and tell you who to be. God has a plan for the real you and not the pretense version of yourself.
I turned my back on my calling. It almost destroyed the best part of me. Don’t turn your back on your true self. Those that love you will accept you. Those that don’t love you will be identified and you can mark them and remove yourself from them so that they cannot hurt you or force you to wear masks.

My true identity is being revealed to all because I’m not afraid to be me.
I surrender to Jesus. I surrender to the best part of me. If you haven’t I hope you find the courage to surrender too! The world and your God deserve the real you.

A testimony Wednesday, October 13, 2021

I awake with a thankful heart. I have seen the light of another day. I can see. I can hear. I can walk. I can breathe. I can talk. I have shelter. I have food. I have purpose. I love. I am loved.

I am not worthy of such blessings. I feel entitled to nothing this morning so everything I’m exposed to this morning feels like charity and grace.

Today, I desire to do everything I do unto the Lord. The Bible says that whatever I do, I should do heartily as to the Lord and not to men. My words and deeds I will do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, and I will give thanks to God the Father through Jesus.

Proverbs 27:7 says that A satisfied soul loathes honeycomb but to a hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.

This reminds me of my walk in the old man, Travis.
Food addiction, drinking too much as a coping mechanism, anger, bitterness, worry, and anxious living. All of these things I learned to live with and allowed them to abuse me. Food addiction and alcohol for example, I knew those two things were killing me. Instant gratification, yes, but the after affects weren’t pleasure but much pain. It was a bitter pill to swallow but I kept on and on and on allowing these things to hurt and abuse me because my soul was empty. I filled my incompleteness with over indulgence, anxiety, worry and self judgement. I was addicted to suffering.

Now, my soul is satisfied. I no longer have the taste for strong drink. I no longer enjoy eating salty or sweet junk. I didn’t over indulge in those things because my belly wasn’t full but because my soul was empty.

These days there are time’s I forget to eat. I can take it or leave it. Like this scripture points out, now that my soul is satisfied in Jesus, it’s as if the only real satisfying food is God’s Word.

To a hungry and empty soul everything taste good, even the stuff that’s killing you.
Nothing is killing this New Man I have put on in Christ. He is well satisfied with the Word and the blessings each new day brings.

A testimony Tuesday, October 12, 2021

Reading this morning I find in Jeremiah chapter 7 where God admonishes me and says do not walk after other gods to your hurt.

I did.

I don’t walk after mythical gods and goddesses as some do today. I know some young people that claim to worship mythical deities, cast spells, and so on. Perhaps they should read of the life of the Witch of Endor? With that said, I have a lot more confidence in those kids than I do my former self. Those kids are trying to find their way and I know God winks at their ignorance as they try and find Him. He will reveal himself in the right season to those that seek authentic worship with the one true God. I can’t blame them for their situation. It has been adults like me that they watched and found no genuineness in. They seen me go to church but still live an empty and hollow existence. They seen me come out of church and then go right back to the weak and beggerly elements of the world. They realized my worship was a charade and pretense. I can’t fix it but I can redeem the time and introduce them to Jesus, not with my words but with my behaviors moving forward. I hope they begin seeing what I feel in my heart; love, joy, peace, a quiet and meek spirit, patience with people and situations, a gentle hand, self control with eating and drinking, faith, protection, more wisdom, no longer a brawler, and much self control of my tongue.

The gods I used to walk after were much more violent and caused much more hurt on my mind and body than any mythical gods worshipped by others.

My gods were instant gratification, food, drink, worry, shame, judgement, self-judgment and legalism. Oh, and don’t forget people. People were my god too. My sweet savior was an after thought. My communion wasn’t with Him daily.

All of my little gods hurt me and were miserable comforters. They left me in the pit, sinking. I couldn’t get out of that pit. How do I know that my false gods hurt me? How do I know that obeying the voice of God and inclining my heart and ears towards God has transformed me?

The difference in how I FEEL and the difference in my state of mind is stark. As well, self acceptance. I have found true self-acceptance and the only place I could find true self acceptance was in Christ Jesus.

I didn’t have joy before. I was depressed. My smiles were fake. I cloaked anger daily. I was bitter. I lacked enthusiasm for life. I felt I carried the weight of the world of those around me on my shoulders. I can go on.

Since Saturday, August 21, 2021 and inclining my heart and ear to my Lord and savior Jesus Christ I have stopped walking in the dictates of my evil heart and I have began arising from sleep thanking my Jesus, connecting with my Jesus, and giving my God praise.

My cup runs over each and every morning and most days. I have no clue what’s happening in the world with politics, religion, vaccines, or anything else. I render to Caesar what is Caesar’s but after that I’m done with it. I work heartily as though unto the Lord. I eat unto the Lord. I dress unto the Lord. Everything I do I try to do unto the Lord and my soul grows fat daily.

God is the Spirit. Neither male or female. God is omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent. God has told me who to worship and it is clear to me. I worship the spirit and character of Jesus. In Jesus is the fullness of the Godhead bodily and I am COMPLETE in Him. I believe in Jesus by grace and through faith.

Yes, that’s what I’m feeling that I didn’t feel when worshiping the gods of this world. I didn’t feel complete and now I do.

Praise God! Today is going to be beautiful. I suspect the lover of my soul will do something amazing and miraculous this day. What a good God I worship and He does answer by fire. It’s a good fire. I dance in His fire today before the entire house of Israel.

A testimony Monday, October 11, 2021

Colossians 1:18 ~ He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything.

With so much to do everyday things can get confusing. We all have a multitude of responsibiltiies and it seems the task list grows daily. We all get to what we can and mark a few tasks off of the list daily but it seems we lose ground daily, adding more to the list than we get marked off.

It used to drive me crazy and I could take no mental or emotional rest. As well, it seemed the most important things always got left off the list.

As the old quote says, "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part." is a great quote to live by but most of us acquiesce to the urgent demands of others and leave off the most important and potentially meaningful parts of our own day.

Things have changed for me. I start the day off putting my Jesus first. Then I do my best in my own weak way to allow the Holy Spirit and energy of Jesus to have first place the remainder of the day and attempt to do every task in His name and unto Him.

I have been overusing the word TRANSFORMATIVE but I don't really know any other word to use these days. This new life in Christ has been transformative.

Each day since Saturday, August 21, 2021 I have done my best in this weak flesh to give Christ preeminance in my life. Life has become more meaningful and exciting to me.

I have always lived a full life or a WIDE life with many experiences but now I am living a more DEEP life and enjoying experiences much more deeply.

So, sometimes simplicity clears up all other confusion. It is simple for me. Allow Christ to be first and put connection with Christ first everyday. If nothing else gets done, nothing else gets done. Surprisingly, I am getting much more done.

His yoke truly is easy and His burdens light.

I love you Jesus.

Colossians 1:18 ~ He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything.

With so much to do everyday things can get confusing. We all have a multitude of responsibiltiies and it seems the task list grows daily. We all get to what we can and mark a few tasks off of the list daily but it seems we lose ground daily, adding more to the list than we get marked off.

It used to drive me crazy and I could take no mental or emotional rest. As well, it seemed the most important things always got left off the list.

As the old quote says, "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part." is a great quote to live by but most of us acquiesce to the urgent demands of others and leave off the most important and potentially meaningful parts of our own day.

Things have changed for me. I start the day off putting my Jesus first. Then I do my best in my own weak way to allow the Holy Spirit and energy of Jesus to have first place the remainder of the day and attempt to do every task in His name and unto Him.

I have been overusing the word TRANSFORMATIVE but I don't really know any other word to use these days. This new life in Christ has been transformative.

Each day since Saturday, August 21, 2021 I have done my best in this weak flesh to give Christ preeminance in my life. Life has become more meaningful and exciting to me.

I have always lived a full life or a WIDE life with many experiences but now I am living a more DEEP life and enjoying experiences much more deeply.

So, sometimes simplicity clears up all other confusion. It is simple for me. Allow Christ to be first and put connection with Christ first everyday. If nothing else gets done, nothing else gets done. Surprisingly, I am getting much more done.

His yoke truly is easy and His burdens light.

I love you Jesus.

A testimony Sunday, October 10, 2021

I have seen good times. I took them for granted. I have seen bad times and I navigated through many of those times with much cowardice, forgetting to thank God for His goodness and forgetting to rejoice my way through the bad times.

My Father, husband and teacher, the Holy Spirit says to try Him. He says to be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let my requests be made known to God; and that the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard my heart and mind through Christ Jesus.

I am learning surrender and submission to His will. It is transformative. A trust is developing that I can’t explain. Many couples use the word “soulmate” loosely. I know that I have and I know that my earthly bride has used that term loosely. I think my wife and I both agree that Sasha Martin and I feel like two sides of the same coin but our true soulmate is the Holy Spirit.

My first love, I left many years ago. The Holy Spirit has never hurt me, never left me, never been angry with me, never not shown me true acceptance, and never not been charitable to me. I was a harlot of a bride. I directed my energies daily towards my personal goals, false gods of this world, and people pleasing. I lived an anxious life. I lived a fear based life. I lived a vain life attempting to show my self worthy of friendships with the world, never truly finding acceptance for my soul and person outside of the protective nature of The Holy Spirit, whom I left.

My thoughts were not my thoughts. Thoughts came to me night and day. You’re still that same fat unworthy kid. You don’t deserve respect, you aren’t like other men, not manly. You don’t have eloquent speech and have a stupid sounding voice. You are not very smart. You aren’t a good friend. You will never be loved being you so you need to change. Thoughts of anger. Regret. Shame. Self-judgement were the thoughts that attacked me constantly but those were not my thoughts. Those were evil spirits or evil energies surrounding me. I accepted those thoughts as if they were my thoughts. They didn’t have to become part of my person but they did because I started THINKING and acting on those thoughts. I touched and agreed with those evil energies and thoughts. I then directed those evil energies and thoughts towards my self (thinking actively) about those things that I thought were my thoughts. I attacked myself and then began attacking everyone around me. The devil is a roaring Lion and sets traps for his prey constantly. The evil energy that is the devil uses trickery, deceit and pretense to trip the saints and I am convinced that the devil uses “thoughts” as much as any other tool to deceive and destroy.

We war not against flesh and blood but against principalities, powers and the rulers of the darkness of this world. We war against spiritual wickedness in high places.
I still have the same thoughts I’ve always had but I find myself laughing at those thoughts now. I don’t have to think those thoughts anymore. I simply laugh at the ridiculousness of the devil’s attempts to get me to declare war on myself.
I have decided to actively direct my energies and My THINKING towards….
Things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, praiseworthy and then I actively choose to meditate on those things.

Ministering angels minister to me daily. Positive energies and thoughts if you will. My late granddaughter Maggie ministers to me. She tells me “Paw Paw, don’t drink anymore.” Her energy says “Paw Paw, don’t hurt yourself anymore.” Other ministering angels speak to me too, telling me God is well pleased with me and my desire to connect with Him daily and to pray without ceasing. Ministering energies speak life and love into my soul constantly now. They tell me to let my heart bleed 🩸 out my love of Christ daily for all to see and so shall I too! They tell me my past shame shouldn’t be shame but is my glory and that my weakness and hidden sin God will use to show forth His mighty works and strengths.

My hurtful sobbing that went on for days without end and in secret has now turned to daily tears of joy for all to see.
My wife is truly my earthen angel and soul mate because she is accepting and nurturing of me. She’s asked me for a decade to stop living in the past and she understands that I am an all in or all out person. She loves that about me. I love that she loves that about me. Today I am all in on my Jesus. Jesus is the lover of my soul and my truest soul mate.

I can love my loved ones so much better now allowing Jesus’ to love them through me.
Jesus is the Lion of the Tribe of Judah, the root and offspring of David and He has prevailed in my life and my wife’s life. A hedge of protection surrounds us and we are His delight. To live is Christ and to die is gain. My life is profitable unto Him and my death will be precious to Him.

Thank you Sasha for being my best friend and wife. I’ve never known such acceptance.

A testimony, Saturday, October 9, 2021

I am just a simpleton, only semi-educated and not good for much except loving people and helping willing and wanting hearts lose weight. So, I cannot tell anyone how to #makeamericagreatagain or how to #buildbackbetter. I can only share with a few people within my circle of influence how my life is becoming great and how I am being built back better.

I am building back better and life is becoming great because I surrendered my heart and life to Christ August 21, 2021. I surrendered my will and submitted to Jesus' will for my life. It was terrifying to walk through that door but I did and for that I am eternally grateful to my Jesus, lover of my soul.

I have let go of judgement, dissimulation, wrath, regret, and guilt. I let all that go on an invisible altar and in faith, I am leaving it there. My spiritual husband, governor, President, Lord and King rules well, is tenderhearted, kind and merciful towards His bride and bears every load for me. Always careful to not place grievous burdens on me that I cannot bear.

He has given me a new name. He gives all that is a member of His bride this new name: Hephzibah which interpreted means protected one and that she is His delight.
I am my God's delight and so are you. All we need do is humble ourselves and turn back to the way of God which produces Love, joy, patience, peace, gentleness, goodness, meekness, temperance, and faith.

If we imitate Christ daily, His protection and peace will be upon us and our souls will be made fat.

I am watching this play out in my life so it is my duty to share what is working for me with all within my reach. I am intentionally imitating my hero as best I can. I fall short daily but the Holy Spirit lets my spirit know that the intent of my heart to do my best unto God is enough.

I want the world to meet my God, Father, brother, and husband.

This is powerful country.

A testimony Tuesday, October 5, 2021

God struck me for my eventual prospering and not for my harm. My history of failure is my glory. God’s anger was kindled against me for my good and not for my harm.
Praise God! God’s anger lasts a short time and His mercy endures forever. My soul is prospering in the Lord. I no longer walk alone. He is with me on the mountaintop and with me in the valley of the shadow of death. God is everywhere and in all things. I FEEL again.

I am favored of God not because of my works but because of my faith in the character of Christ Jesus. I will do my best today to imitate my hero, Jesus. I will eat unto Him. I will live unto Him. I will die unto Him. I will avoid alcohol unto Him. Moreover, I will engage in self care unto Him, I will love those that feel unlovable unto Him. I will be with Him in His garden forevermore because I have overcome by His blood and by the word of my testimony.

David once said, before my affliction I forgot about you God but after my affliction, God you are good and you do good!!!!

God has opened the gates to his goodness to me once again. I feel the gates shall be open to me continually now. Open in season and out of season. I am committed and all in with Jesus and what a pleasure it is to stand firm and commit to a life of spirit filled living.

I feel that this morning.

Faith over feelings, YES. I agree.

However, I sure love this feeling I have this morning and I want to hold on to it because it is a pleasure to my fattening soul.

This is a feeling way. I feel again.

I love you Jesus, lover of my soul.

A testimony Monday, October 4, 2021

Jesus loves me—this I know,
For the Bible tells me so;
Little ones to him belong,—
They are weak, but he is strong.

The problems that I have had in my life and the resultant misery caused by those problems, didn't happen to me because was a bad person. They happened to me because I am a believing person.

Those problems; food addiction, alcohol, sickness, worry, shame, and feelings of worthlessness are my GLORY.

I boast in those weaknesses with all of my heart. This is ME. I am weak and undone. I am sick. I am overweight. I am troubled.

These have been my tribulations. My tribulations are my GLORY.
To the world it means I am weak. To God, it is my GLORY! For without my GLORY, HE will not show forth HIS GLORY to the WORLD. God requires my weakness as much as I require HIS strength.

Today, I decrease so my God, the lover of my soul, can increase in my life. Today, my husband and provider lifts me from my former depraved state, fills my heart with love, mercy, and truth.

Again, today, I am being called into HIS LOVE. I become one with Him and I know He will never break my heart.

I humble myself as a little child before His throne of Grace. I breathe in the incense of His FAVOR this very moment.

I don't need to overindulge in food, alcohol, judgement or shame. In Him and walking in the newness of life I have transcended those base things.

Darkness has it's teaching and God hid His face from me for a moment and wrinkle in time. Now, God's light and love drives the teachings of darkness from His bride.

If you are weak and undone, come and glory with me in our tribulations and let's let God use His strength and GLORY be made known to everyone we come in contact with and let this hurting world see His transformative love in action.

I love you brothers and sisters.
www.shibbydo.com

Your fellow servant in Christ,
Travis Martin

A testimony Friday, October 1, 2021

Walk in the Spirit. If you do walk in the Spirit expect to be called simple, foolish and worse. It’s ok. Smile. Smile because it might just mean you’re finally living and loving right.

God’s wisdom is considered foolishness in the world. The world is at war with the Spirit of God.

Hate versus Love. Evil versus Good. Judgement versus Liberty. Punishment versus Mercy. Deception versus Charity. Darkness versus Light.

The World versus God.

Our weapons are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds;

I declare Love wins for God is love.

Darkness will surrender to light. Every knee will bow and every tongue confess Jesus.

I surrender now.

A testimony September 29, 2021

I’ve found such peace through faith in God’s grace and through His Word.

Does any man speak like this man spoke? No, indeed!

Many names have been given to God. He’s a counselor to those who need counsel. A lawyer to those who need a lawyer. A father to the fatherless. A husband to the husbandless. A chief priest to those that need a priest. He is the Almighty God because He cannot be labeled. Labels limit but we try to label God anyway.
Today I’ll call God PEACE.

God isn’t peace like the world tries to give. The world attempts to give peace through entitlements, welfare, “injections”, social security, material possession, job titles and the like.
God gives PEACE that passes all understanding. Today I won’t leave peace. I will worship this PEACE.
Peace - Free from disturbance; tranquility.

For years the messengers of satan buffeted me with satan’s evil messages:
Worry, shame, regret, judgement, and feelings of Inadequacy buffeted me day and night. I thought those evil spirits were thoughts and feelings deep within my own psychology. They weren’t. They were stumbling blocks the wicked one used to stumble me on my way to PEACE.

In faith I realize those evil spirits were simply trying to get me to suffocate my light so that I couldn’t worship PEACE and I couldn’t share that PEACE with everyone I come in contact with.

Today, I am victorious. I AM VICTORIOUS in the Great I AM.
Today I have risen. I have put on Christ. He is my garment. Love is my garment. I love myself. I love you.

The God of Peace has bruised those evil spirits and put them under my feet. I do not have to entertain the evil spirits for one second today and neither do you.

A testimony September 28, 2021