Please pray for me to get back my motivation. I lost 100# in 2019. Made some poor decisions after a year on program. I skipped most holidays bc I wanted to lose weight fast. So when Christmas and New Year's came, I thought I would take those 2 weeks and then get back on schedule. Well I took those 2 weeks, then some more, a little more. Then COVID came. I'm a nurse, so I figured I was going to get it and die anyway, so might as well eat what I want and die happy. I know that's wrong thinking. I don't know what happened!? I had done so good! It was so easy! I just can't get back to where I'm ready to start! I'll think, let me fit in one more sweet, or dessert before I start. Then, I'm eating a whole pack or dessert. It's just a slippery slope, and it's been killing me for years! I work remotely due to physical problems. It's great! It's been a blessing in so many ways! But, it has hurt my stamina. I'm weaker than ever and hurting more! It's ridiculous! I don't understand what's going on in my mind and body to keep me in this shape, in so much pain to be embarrassing myself in public. Please pray for me. For whatever is going on in my mind or body to move out of the way! For me to just start! One meal! Just one meal, and then work up. I've got to do this, or I'm going to be one of the youngest people in a nursing home and definitely suicidal at that point. Please pray that I can wake up, and get out of this fog!